It seems that these posts are rather sporadic, so sorry about that. Hopefully now that my fall semester has officially ended I will be up for writing more.
This semester was certainly a doozy. My classes were the hardest they’ve ever been, I completed my senior thesis project, and also helped planned a few events on my school’s Campus Events Council. Needless to say I was pretty busy. So come last Wednesday when it all ended, I was very thankful. There were times that were harder than others these past few months, but God stayed faithful through it all. He provided me with an amazing support system of friends and family that were there to lend a listening ear or a much-needed hug. Also, an immune system that stayed true throughout the semester, especially towards the end where I avoided a bad bug going around my apartment that I just couldn’t afford to catch. Talk about blessings!
While I have thought about this semester daily and the amazing care I am in of such a powerful God, this winter break has also brought on new tasks… like finding a job. Even though I’ve not even been home a week, the sense that I need to figure out what I am doing once I graduate seemed to overwhelm me last night. I researched jobs for about two hours and came up with nothing, feeling completely defeated that I did not figure out my future then and there. I was lost.
I was wallowing on the couch in self-pity from coming up empty-handed when the doorbell rang. The mailman dropped off a package addressed to me. It was a care package from my best friend who had just gotten back from studying abroad in England, and it was filled with goodies that she brought back for her loved ones.
That’s when I started crying. Besides the fact that someone had thought to send me such a lovely gift, for no reason at all, the timing couldn’t have been better. As I rifled through the package, I just heard God saying Calm the heck down! You’re gonna be fine. It zapped me back into the reality that I have an awesome God that is looking after me and knows everything is going to fall into place.
The package from my dear friend wasn’t only the thing that brought me out of my moment of despair, but rather what made me realize all the other things that I’ve been blessed with to get me through the low moments:
A concerned mom, who was readily there to give me a hug when she saw I was down;
An encouraging dad, who provided plenty stories of his own experiences to reassure me that everything would work out;
A wonderful boy who sends me random texts throughout the day that never fail to make me smile;
A Bible verse I had read the night before, Isaiah 58:11:
The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.
I returned to my spot on the couch later that night to watch the Sound of Music that was playing on TV. Of course, as I begin to tune in, it’s at the part where Maria is frolicking her way to the Von Trapp house, and is singing that song “I Have Confidence.” Like c’mon, what is this timing? As she merrily strolled along and continued with verses upon verses, I was encouraged all over again that everything is going to be fine. I just need to have confidence in me!
While I may tend to forget all the little things every now and then, there are always greater reminders to what God has provided me, which in the end is just the greatest support system ever. I’m sure I’ll feel the anxiety of job-hunting again in the future, but I also know that right there with it will be the calming peace the Lord has to offer me daily.
And mind me with each step I am more certain
Everything will turn out fine
I have confidence the world can all be mine
They’ll have to agree I have confidence in me