A letter to my 2-weeks ago self

You’re going to be fine.

In hindsight, you knew you would. But that obviously didn’t save you from the restless nights, the panic attacks, or worst-case scenarios playing out in your head. But you can calm down!

Actually, it’s probably okay that you’re freaking out. It’s motivating! Just make sure you’re having these little episodes in front of no one. If anyone must see, let it be the people who are going to love you anyways.

I know you’re sick of the questions. “What are you doing now that you’ve graduated?” “What kind of work are you looking to do?” “What places are you looking at?” Well, you’ll answer those questions soon enough. Unsurprisingly, they’re still annoying, and you still won’t want to answer them, even though your responses have changed. You’ll start to question if all we ever care about is status and identifying ourselves in the jobs we hold.

You’re on the right path to finding yourself. Don’t worry about the job, because God will bring you the right one when you least expect it; and in less time than you think. Or maybe it’s not the right one? It’s too soon to tell, but I have that inkling that we’re right where we’re supposed to be at the moment.

Keep finding yourself, and what makes you happy. It doesn’t have to make you money yet. Even the people who love you most and are desperately trying to help you be happy can’t tell you what it is in the end. But be thankful for them anyways.

Life isn’t any easier once you find that job. Now there is actual work to do. But you’re helping people, and that’s good. It’s not the final destination, either, so just be happy where you are now.

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I’m back(?)

Well it’s no secret that I’ve been on somewhat of a hiatus with this blog, really taking a break before it even got started. When I got shin splints this summer I got really deterred in terms of my training, taking a break from running for about two more weeks to let my legs fully heal. Here’s a small overview of how the rest of my summer went:

  • Once my shins healed, I started the 21 Day Fix program after 4th of July weekend. With the intense daily workouts, I did not do any actual running, but the exercises obviously included plenty of cardio. I was also very aware of what I was eating and the portion sizes. I lost about 8 pounds and was feeling great. (For the record, I would recommend Beach Body’s 21 Day Fix to anyone. It is pretty intense, but have modified workouts included in the exercise sets for those just starting out.)
  • The week after 21 Day Fix ended, I went to the beach. Thinking I was still going to stay as active as I was on the program, I was a lot more lenient about what I was putting in my body. Thoughts are a nice thing, but thoughts don’t keep you in shape – actually exercising does. Pretty much ruined everything I had just earned in the weeks prior.
  • Spent the last few weeks of the summer working and moving, and just getting ready for the school year in general. I was working out a few days a week, but not as hard as I had been before my injuries.

It is unfortunate that all my hard work ended up going to waste. And I know that only I can be to blame. I was still nervous about experiencing shin splints again those few last weeks of the summer, so I was purposefully taking it easy. Since school has started, it’s been hard juggling two part-time jobs, a full school load, and my senior thesis project – a.k.a. the bane of my existence – while also trying to find time to go to the gym and making sure I’m always mindful of what I’m putting into my body. Oh, and this new thing I’ve been trying out called a having a boyfriend. Yeah, that’s a fairly new development, but he’s been a real blessing.

North Shore Cancer Run 2014

Oh, but I did run a 10K this month!

Anyways, this probably sounds like a lot of complaining (except maybe not the boyfriend part – you’re welcome, Wes) and I realize that people have it way worse than me and still find time to take care of themselves, blah, blah, blah… I get it. I realize that I have let myself down. And that’s why I stopped writing for so long. But as the semester is slowing down, and I’ll have more time in the coming months before I GRADUATE (WHAT?!), I wanted to resurrect this blog and start over.

 

But this time around, I don’t want to limit myself to writing about running and eating well. Yes, I want to be healthier in those aspects, but I want to be healthier in all aspects of my life. In friendships, relationships, spiritual life, and work ethics. So now, I will be writing about whatever I darn please! This will allow me more freedom in my posts, and probably lead to more consistency. I really hope to keep this going. So, my virtually non-existent Internet friends, please bear with me as I try to revamp this blog, as well as my life.